I’ve been getting this stupidly horrendous pain in my lower back that shoots down my leg and I pretty much just can’t lift my leg because of it, so I spent last night on a romantic date with Boyfriend at emerg to see why I was falling apart this time. Turns out I have sciatica – which means that something is compressing my sciatic nerve in my lower back and making life really hard on me. As soon as I hear the word sciatica I immediately start picturing a young Al Pacino walking out of the bank he is holding up and screaming “Attica! Attica!” over and over again while punching the air. I’ve never actually seen Dog Day Afternoon but I assume it is about a man who has compressed nerves in his lower back which makes him really angry and irritable and he’s told that the medication to fix it will cost a lot of money so he goes and robs a bank. And then when he is bringing a hostage outside he means to scream “Sciatica! Sciatica!” over and over because that’s why he is doing this, but he’s in so much pain he just can’t get the beginning of the word out so it ends up sounding like “Attica” and everyone thinks its an ode to a prison riot and that it’s really deep so he just pretends that it is to seem cooler. That’s basically the plot, right? When I get one of those damn sharp pains in my back when I lift my leg I just picture a tiny microscopic Al Pacino in there hanging out on my spine walking around and punching my vertebrae screaming “SCIATICA!” And now I really don’t like Al Pacino.
Anyway, the doctor told me I shouldn’t really yoga for awhile because it probably happened at yoga or it was a combination of slipping on the ice that St. John’s pretends is sidewalks in the winter and then going to yoga and just making it worse. So I’m taking a few days off from my yoga challenge which pisses me off but at the same time it’s so cold and windy outside that I don’t really hate the idea of not having to leave my house. I plan on starting up again on Saturday morning at yin yoga which is my favourite kind of yoga. I really hope Erica plays more cool songs at the end of class so that I can post more pictures of Tobey Maguire crying faces.
For now I will just continue working on embarrassing stories about how I suck at being an adult and maybe post some of those in lieu of embarrassing yoga updates. And I will sit on my couch with my heating pad all day googling Disney vacations and pretending I can afford to go back to Disney World with my bestie Melissa. Oh, and I will eat a lot of ice cream because I have sciatica so I deserve it and you can’t stop me.
I guess it could be worse.